Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Accidental Terrorist School

You know what's weird? being able to drive across different countries. This Easter we spent in Switzerland.

Switzerland in a Summary:

Crazy Dog Poo Signs..Bleurk!

Pointy Mountains. Pretty.

We decided to go Switzerland so we could go to the HR Giger Museum & Bar... Why it is in the city of Gruyères? who knows. It's pretty random. You should go. Unless you don't want to see a lady having sex with an alien. lots and lots of alien penetration happening in this place.

Our B&B was in the village of Grindelwald (JK Rowling you name stealer you!) looking up into the Swiss Alps - specifically the Eiger Mountain, also known amongst people with little fashion sense - as the North Face. North Face clothes are for chumps. Even more so if you have never even been to the North Face. Which I have, so I am allowed to wear a hideous parka and scuba shoes if I choose to - which I don't, because I am not blind.

Another place we visited was a place called 'Thun' which was like a place Disneyland was based on, this place was so picaresque it didn't seem real. The water was unlike any colour I have ever seen. They tell me that the colour of the water is a phenomenon based on the fact that the water is so clean - even the fish are starving to death because they have nothing to eat. Poor Clean Country.

Mostly though - driving around Switzerland just leads to a lot of arguments. Specifically GPS arguments. I swear the GPS wants me to get a divorce. It's impossible to not want to kill each other when the GPS is telling you to turn left, and by turning left means driving directly up an Alp. Not Possible GPS!

When we were driving back to the airport - one part Switzerland, one part France, we accidentally missed our turn off to the airport and ended up in France again? wtf. Then you just drive around the roundabout and back into Switzerland. So weird. Imagine doing that in the Middle East? there you are on your nice relaxing vacation in Jordan, floating around on the Dead Sea - and then you dry off and go to drive home and accidentally cross the border into Iraq. Then you end up in some Terrorist School learning to fly planes into buildings all because your cross cultural miming was misconstrued when you did the planes flying hand movements.

And that is why I am going to punch the person who invented the TomTom in the face.

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