Friday, August 20, 2010

Reckless. Pretty Reckless

Last night I saw Little J from Gossip Girl play her debut London performance at the O2 Islington with her band "The Pretty Reckless".

O.M.G.

First up though, the support band: they were called something really gay like "Francesca" which really didn't go with the type of band they were at all, they were a group of hot 19 year olds. They should have called their band "testosterone" or "STD" because seriously, they would have fucked anything that moved within the audience.

So the support band played for 30 mins. Then we waited.... and waited... and waited some more. We figured we were waiting because they were going to unveil some amazing stage set-up, but no turns out we were just waiting for the sake of waiting.

Then OMG The Pretty Reckless come on stage.

The first thing I noticed about the band, was that all the members looked like people I knew. First up the bass player looked exactly like my friend Graham. Graham thinks he's trent reznor. Graham has had the same goatie beard style on his chin for 15 years. Graham wears leather man bracelets and tight black t-shirts that show off his chubby man pecs. Graham is living the dream inside his own head. The bass player was Grahams twin. I was jumping up and down screaming "graham! graham!" if there was any band that Graham is likely to show up in, it's this - a band where a girl wears crotch showing panties.

The lead guitarist.. looks exactly like my mum's boyfriend Rich. Like Exactly. I'm thinking to myself "how the fuck did Rich and Graham end up in a band together??" So to paint the scene for you: The band is made up of 45 year olds, 45 year old Bon Jovi roadies and trent reznor wannabes. But that is not the point. The point is we came here to see Little J.

And then she comes out.. in all her panda eyes, lingerie, flap showing, hair extensions and leather jacket wearing glory.

(note Graham in the background)

The Pretty Reckless played their entire catalogue.. which sums up to about 6 songs. They were the headlining act and they played for 25 minutes. During that time Taylor shook her extensions all over the stage and wore a guitar around her neck like an ornament and crotch thrusted into the eyeballs of everyone in the front row. But hey, that is what we can came here for.

The thing is.. Taylor Momsen can sing. She can sing for a rock band at any rate. She has great stage presence, it is really unfortunate that she is in a band with a bunch of wet towels. Old Wet Towels. It's just a bit not right having a 17 year old dressed as a hooker with a bunch of old men prancing around on stage and rubbing her underage boobs all over Graham the Bass Players old flabby arms.

Not that Taylor's whore look is anything new - She rocks the look, she just needs to be in a band where she doesn't look so out of place. She needs to go back in time and be in The Runaways. People will say that Taylor is trying her hardest to be Courtney Love, but honestly Cherie Currie did that look first and Cherie Currie did it better, because at least Cherie was in The Runaways with a kickass all girl rock band behind her. If Taylors 17 year old raunch is too much for you just remember that Cherie was only 15 when she graced the stage in sexy lingerie back in the 70's..


Overall, I would say that seeing the Pretty Reckless lived up to all my expectations of being a rubbish trainwreck. They are worth seeing just to hear Taylor pumping up the crowd "this song is for everyone who has woken up with a hangover!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Umm have you ever even had a hangover you underage nitwit?

Reckless. Pretty Reckless.

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