Tuesday, June 09, 2009

TV Pitch: Scab Stories

I don't know about you, but I realllly love scabs.

Granted, the injury part of the process stinks, but luckily you have the scab phase to enjoy, so it all evens out.

I love picking scabs, I love resisting picking scabs, I love picking up a corner and peering under the scab, I love the fresh pink skin under a scab, and I love holding my scab and inspecting it once its fallen off and done its duty.

It's a feeling of ... I created this!!!!!!

There could be a nuclear explosion right now, and years from now aliens could find my scab and clone me and I will live again.. goddam scabs are awesome.

But unfortunately I am confined only to enjoying my own scabs.. and I don't really injure myself that often to get many to fawn over.

So.. I would like to pitch to a Lifestyle Channel, a TV show called: SCAB STORIES

Scab Stories (which I would host) would follow the stories of various people of differing ages and injuries and the healing process of their scabs..

I would have children who have fallen over and constantly pick at their scabs.
I would follow teenagers around skate parks waiting for them to injure themselves so I could film the scab story from the very beginning.
I would find upper middle class snobs who have scabs and follow them around whilst they resist picking their scabs
I would get Celebrity Scabs
I would cut myself so I had scabs
I would go to vets and get animal scabs
I would go into a laboratory so we could all see Magnified Scabs

Man that sounds like an awesome show!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where's my TV deal??!?!!!

2 comments:

Pomgirl said...

Could you also have a Scabs Gone Wrong feature on people who couldn't resist picking their scabs and then regretted it? Sad music playing while they discuss their pain, regret, lessons learned blah-de-blah, close-ups of their agonised faces and scars.

I still have a small scar on my wrist from picking the scab that I got falling off my bike at the age of 9. If my suffering could help other people...

suze2000 said...

EWWWW!!! Haha.

I used to be a scab picker too. For the same reason I can't resist a pimple even though I know it's bad. If I get a bad scab now, I STILL can't fully resist it when it's close to healing.

I wish I'd known then how many scars I would have now, I would have been more careful to avoid injury.