Monday, September 01, 2008

Stripperboats


sooo...Hens Nights.

There is something surreal about Hens Nights. A floating nightclub packed to the rafters with women. Women everywhere with little to no clothing on. And any male in the room, has to automatically get naked. Even the weedy bartender was taking his shirt off! I have never in my life been such a grabby molesterer. Men all oiled up and sliding off you. Crazy.

I have to say though, next time I will know to go to wear a crotch revealing dress, because even though the strippers are paid to dance with you, they really don't like you if you are dressed properly. I mean it is winter! I'm allowed to wear pants! Can I get some sambo-action??



I have to say, I have never been happier to be married and have a nice couch and cat to come home to. If i'm gonna get a dick in the face, i'd rather it be my husband and not some freak in leather pants.

However - how wrong is this!! Halfway through the cruise when all the maggoty half naked horny chicks are falling over themselves, a Football Team!!!! gets on the boat!! umm wtf are they doing here?? (Balmain Tigers) seriously, with all the horrid rape stories you hear about football players should they be in that sort of environment? It wouldnt surprise me to hear about some poor 21 year old getting gang-banged by 5 players in a hotel room later that day.

so in conclusion: Stripperboats. Not for the faint-hearted.

3 comments:

Bedazzler said...

Take it from someone who knows - Getting gang-banged by 5 footy players in a hotel room is some people's ambition. I'm not even joking! And leather doesn't dry-clean so well. try getting lipstick off it!

Sarah said...

A footy team showing up on a stripper boat full of drunk, horny women who vastly outnumber the few males on the boat makes perfect sense... Not a pretty sight, sure, but it makes sense.

Bedazzler said...

I'm just kind of mesmerised by this post, and have to keep coming back and looking at it. It's particularly fascinating the way that woman is lying straight as a board with her arms pinned to her side, while that stripper sits on her face, and everyone else is watching really studiously like it's some kind of mechanical demonstration. That all takes a lot of control.