Wednesday, May 21, 2008

VIP Rooms...

VIP Rooms... for Very Important People?? or just Very Idiotic Poseurs.

There is a new(ish) club in Sydney, that gets more and more wank everytime I go. Let us bear in mind that this club isn't even finished yet. They only just got the water feature working, and there are still unfinished rooms towering over the centrepiece atrium, as well as exposed pipes, unfinished concrete walls and an entryway that looks like you'd get raped and left to rot in a dumpster if you wandered down there after the doorwhores had knocked off.

This club is just too popular for its own good, and for what reason?

Lines. Lines to get in the club. Lines to go up the stairs. Lines to go into the VIP room. Who has time for all these lines? and furthermore do we really want to live in world with such heirarchy in clubs that you spend half you night waiting in lines to get to the 'cooler' and 'trendier' part of the club that is pretty much exactly the same as the part you just left.

The VIP room is such a farce. The VIP room's power only exists to seduce and entice people, because you give into the dream that you are not good enough to be in there in the first place, thus it becomes an object of desire and your value of self worth balanced on weather or not the skanks with the clipboards will let you pass.

I hate VIP rooms. They are full of idiots who indulge in paying $170 for the 'cheapest bottle of champagne'.. are you kidding?? what would cost me $30 in the downstairs pleb bar costs 5 times up here because we have ceramic elephants and a grand piano?

The doorwhores and their clipboards. Give me strength. Listen up bitches you do realised that anyone with half an ounce of sneakiness just goes in the side entrance, and avoids your snide comments and raised eyebrows all-together. Not to mention that the VIP room, only becomes the VIP room after a particlar time of night, until then its open to all who would dare cross its sacred threshold. But who wants to get to the club at 2pm?? I don’t wanna be no maggotron ‘Weekend at Burnies’ comatose body by midnight.

Wankers.

Do people need to feed some sadistic need to be told that they are scumsucking plebs who deserve to be lined up like sheep, judged and most likely denied. What is wrong with you people?

'Oooh look at me i'm in the VIP room! I feel so much better about myself. I am far superior to the people who are standing 2 meters away from me on the non VIP carpet'

You’re not important. You’re an idiot. You buy into the hype that you need to be someone of importance to get into the VIP room. You spend all your money on edamame beans and generic chandon. To rub shoulders with 80 year old tanned aquatics with prostitutes ‘livin the high life’.. sorry but I’d rather be on the downstairs level with the loser-nobodies. In fact I don’t want to be in your exclusive club at all.

8 comments:

kit said...

Oh yes, VIP rooms are for tools. This reminded me of a post on Clublife that pretty much sums up the stupidity of the general public...
http://standingonthebox.blogspot.com/2008/04/rats.html

Paul said...

I agree with the VIP room thing, but the club itself I quite like. I think you're missing the appeal of a place like that.

Hot. Young. Girls.

Thats it. Any club that draws in Hot. Young. Girls. will be popular. How it manages it is a mystery (though I do like the myriad of different seating configurations)

Mex said...

so... this place... does it start with an I and rhyme with "jivy"?

such a wankish place to go. and so is hemmesphere. $10 for the cheapest beer on the menu and the door bitches are all whores too.

Rach said...

and rhymes with SHMIVY

yes.

Wee-H said...

I recognise the place and ive only been once from the UK!

I thought the women in there were scary as hell. Do sydney women not eat??

Steph said...

See this is why I go to my local ARI (RSL) and get smashed on three dollar drinks first.

I'm all class. You know it.

Sez said...

I visited this club last week for the first time last week, and your description matches my impression.

I lasted all of 2 minutes before I turned to my companion saying, "this is way too wankerish for me, let's go next door for a nosh up and a cheap beer."

Miss A said...

yep, I knew we were talking SNIVY