Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Maybe i'll be...

A Paleontologist - then I could be like Ross from 'Friends' and be the big nerd that everyones pays out on. I could get a tweed jacket with leather patches on the elbows and drive around in a yellow VW bug. Perks: Dinosaurs don't talk back. Drawbacks: having to work in a lab with people making constant jokes about giant boners.. (ok, I would be the one making all the lame jokes)

Asteroid Catcher - How fun looking up at the stars all day looking for an asteroid, because what are the odds really, that you are going to find one? You could pretty much surf facebook and watch DVD's all day, as long as you were within 10 meters of the telescope. I'm sure that if there was an asteroid someone would find it - hence noone dies - hence I don't get fired. Perks: telling people that you are saving the planet, 'constant vigilance' for asteroids' Drawbacks: constant lame 'ass-teroids playin up agin' jokes.. again, my bad. Plus I think you need to be good at maths to do that and unfortunately I get lost figuring out what to do with the remainder doing long division.

Stand-Up Comedienne - i'd love to be strutting back and forth in a leather catsuit yakkin it up. Unfortunately, I don't have a routine, material, nor saucy catsuit. Perks: Having a reason to wear too-short jeans and sneakers, and butting into peoples conversations going "you ever notice how..." Drawbacks: definite thrush epidemic from the catsuit. Could possibly get a Canesten Sponsorship however.

Plans. Plans. Plans.

8 comments:

jali said...

I'm impressed - yesterday you were lazy - now you've made plans.

non-Blondie said...

thrush jokes? yep, definitely female stand-up for you!

(and i like lame work related jokes)

Sez said...

Noice! Canesten will be knocking down your door.

babydoll said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
babydoll said...

Rachel, o-lazy-one, I saw this the other day at work and when I read about your plans for asteroid catching, I just had to share...

Brings a whole new meaning to the ass-teroid joke...

babydoll said...

ok so here's the url:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqf-pqZhWKE

for the link that I posted that apparrantly doesn't want to work.

Rach said...

that is awesome. i want one. i love the feeling of wind on my asshole.

and then to have my space-poop turn into a shooting star!!

that my friend is poetry in motion.

unique_stephen said...

I'm am a Paleontologist (well a geologist who specialised in soft rock and paleontology) and I have done some Standup (wana see me stretch a stocking over my face to do my impression of a vagina's eye view of a dental dam?) and I went to uni to do astronomy - almost ticking the last box.