Thursday, May 17, 2007

New Job.. New Threads

One of the best (worst?) things about starting a new job, besides being the stinkin NEW person who everyone judges within the first 5 seconds of meeting you.. is what to wear in that first week... this is a new job where I will definitely need new clothes, shoes, and some sort of Panic Button when i'm running away from all the rapists through the park.

Clothes - seen as how its in the music industry, i feel I should gay it up and start wearing instrument paraphenalia around.. guitar earrings, maybe get some fake treble clef tattoos, ripped jeans and some fishnet stocking tops to hang my pierced nipples out of.. or would that be too much??

Shoes - the place i'm working is in one of those 'dodgy' areas.. although everyone says it's on the good side of that area. any suburb that gets described as having a 'good side' cant be all that safe... so I will definitely be investing in some sneakers so I can run through the park to the train station after work.. here's what will happen.. eventually everyone will cotton on to my fear of walking the streets outside the building and witness me running my ass off to get through the park and start referring to me as 'ol lighning'...."must be quittin time.. there goes ol' lighning".. i've always wanted a cool work nickname.

Panic Buttons - in addition to my sneakers, I will also be investing in a panic button, some nunchucks, some pepper spray, an umbrella with a knife in the handle for stabbing would-be attackers, and perhaps some sort of cheap bodyguard labor from some 10 year olds with nothing better to do.

Safety First!!!!

5 comments:

AJ said...

I felt exactly the same when I started to work in a dodgy part of the city and had a long train commute. I was so naive that I even went into a chemist and asked if they sold mace.

Apparently not.

redcap said...

Holy hell, are you working on The Block or something? I make it a rule to never buy shoes in which I can't run. Sadly, sometimes the bastards get the better of me. Technically, I could run in my knew boots, but if I did they would gnaw the flesh from my toe bones.

Kate said...

you seriously need to take your stand up comedy routine on the road. lol.

Leisa said...

I think you MUST invest in instrument paraphernalia... but hold off on wearing it till the 2nd week...'ol lightnin'!

We should celebrate - Pizza Hut all you can eat is calling your name!

Only me said...

Is this area so "bad arse" you cant get a taxi there?!