Thursday, April 19, 2007

Temping Escapades

Chapter 1 - The one where the company had no idea that a temp was coming in.

Today I started my first ever job as a Temp, something to do in the interrim between finding a full time job, and earning some cash so I can support my fringe upkeep.

The building I work in is one of those massive skyscrapers, I have never been on the 18th floor, let alone ridden in a lift with a see-thru panel.. I almost up-chucked from vertigo.. And that wouldnt have been a great look, vomit all over my nice new 'professional pants'.

Things have been all downhill since the lift.

When I arrived, NOONE had any idea a temp was coming in, so when I said "i'm here to fill in reception" they just pointed at the desk in-front of me.
TEMP FACT 1 - people think you are blind and retarded.
Yes, thank you for pointing out the reception desk for me, had you not done so I would have stood outside trying to decipher telecommunication signals with my hands. Dicks.

Nobody came to tell me what to do, I had to figure out how to use the switchboard, with a minimum amount of accidental hang-ups. Did anyone have the access codes to log onto the computer?? ofcourse not. Why would you have pesky information like that when I should be able to hack into the computer myself.

I located a folder with some semi-useful information, like the person who does this job fulltime is supposed to 'get fruit' of a morning (but NO exotic fruit?? would plums fall into this category?) But without someone coming to tell me what specificially I should be doing aside from answering phones, I really had no idea.

After about 3 hours of sitting and staring, I was finally given a tour by some kind-hearted individual, who 'mimed' how to unpack the dishwasher for me.
TEMP FACT 2 - trust nothing to a stupid temp, specially unloading a common dishwasher.

After about 4 hours I had a spac attack, and said that I don't know what you expect from me, what exactly are you employing me for?? and could I get a little guidance because for all I know I should be making a decorative fan out of coloured post-its.

They 'allowed' me to get the mail... ooooh.. I wonder if that is considered a temp-promotion.

Gaysville. Oh well, they're essentially paying me to blog, MSN peeps and steal their batteries. Word Up.
Tomorrow can only get better - perhaps they'll mime how to 'fax' something
"patang patang patang.. ziiiiiiioooooooooooooo brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"

5 comments:

phishez_rule said...

I would define that as 'frustrating'

Cazzie!!! said...

Sorry that happened to you, I am a nurse and Agency nurses used to get treated like that years ago. It has gotten better the last few years ads many nurses now work casual as I do. Then again, everyone knows me where I work, all over the hospital, so they don't worry about me doing short cuts, that's because I wouldn't ever do them.
"Take no prisoners" Rach, let em know how ya feel.

Kate said...

hey! that sounds like my job and i've been here for ten years.

Marcheline said...

Girl, you make me laugh!

Not only is what you say absolutely true (been there), but the way you put things really highlights the already blaring stupidity of most generic full-time office personnel.

Thanks for the chuckle! I needed it today.

- M

surfercam said...

You sure you got out on the right floor????