Thursday, October 19, 2006

Wanted: Job as an ELF

Normal is boring. I am so over my humdrum existence as a '9-5 person'.. I wanna be an Elf.

Being an Elf would be sooooo much cooler than just being me, I would be helping people and looking cute all day long.

The Pro's are far and wide: for instance;
  • Get to be Mischievous
  • Help People
  • Find Gold
  • Do Good Deeds
  • Wear Cute Outfits
  • Be friends with Frogs, Mice, & Princesses
  • Have massive Elf Parties and drink Cider
  • Be One-On-One terms with Santa
  • Ride Flying Reindeers
  • Wear adorable Elf shoes with curly toes and bells on them and jingle around all day

I really can't go on any longer just being me. I need to Elfify myself, luckily with christmas around the corner, I can get away with wearing elf hats and bells on my shoes.. any other time of year, and i'd probably get a few filthy looks from people who don't understand the magic of the Elf Lifestyle.

3 comments:

Adam said...

Wasn't that dude in Lord of the Rings an Elf? You'd also be good at archery and dispatching ogres. Mad skillz!

Rach said...

Yes.

Running, Looking Hot, Never breaking into a sweat - are all good reasons to become an Elf.

Steph said...

Just make sure you join the Union.
I hear Santa is a right cunt and the working conditions are atrocious!