Monday, August 28, 2006

Tax Return 2006

I did my own tax-return this year. Woo Hoo Go-Me! that is almost as exciting to learn how to blow balloons up or tie your own shoelaces (both of which I learnt to do at Pizza Hut - where have all the good family fun restaurants gone??)

I don't see what is so hard about doing a tax return? I claimed for all sorts of crazy shit.

If anyone from the ATO is reading this, I did NOT claim for any crazy shit.. I claimed for all purely legitimate stuff.

including:

$2800 - Travel Expenses
I had to go to New York to see Spamalot.

$1600 - Clothing Expenses
Work makes me dress up a lot.. I can't very well turn up to work on 'dress like a pirate-wench' day without a pirate wench outfit??

That goes doubly for 'dress up as an echidna day'.. took me ages to put together that pointy suit...either way.. I dont make the rules... if you need a written authorisation saying that it really was "converse and Mavi day" at work I can get something to you on my work's letterhead.. just dont call my boss... she doesn't like talking to strangers.

$17, 800 - Other Work Related Expenses
Hey if you're going to have heading as vague as "other" well expect me to claim for a bunch of random shit.
  • Gigantic rubber vibrator - to use as an 'erasor' at work - should i ever need a giant rubbery penis shaped erasor to rub out a giant penis shaped mistake.
  • Mooks Sunglasses - for wearing to the play that was outdoors
  • Gucci Boots - for wearing to the play that was indoors
  • Trip to LA to stalk Christian Bale - needed to know what the real Batman looked like for a reference for the KFC commerical I was casting for.

cant wait for my tax return cheque .. or jail.... either way.

3 comments:

Cazzie!!! said...

'dress up as an echidna day'
Gigantic rubber vibrator
OMG, you crack me up!!! That is an amazing feat to go claim this stuff...of course it is legit and all, LOL!!!
I used to do my own online until this year, but I paid some1 to do it for me a few weeks ago. So I am getting a nice return for all that tax I been paying this year, Ah-men!!

Los said...

That was "Creative." I'm always too much of a chicken-sh*t to claim that kind of stuff.

River said...

Since you're still blogging in august 2007 I'm guessing you didn't go to jail, so did you get the giant cheque instead?